[x]

Safeshe tells me that they stole her words
marked them in red and wrung them out dry
leaving her shockingly [bare]
so she took up her -sharpest- pen
and she c a r v e d out her words
[close to her heart they'll be safe]

Mimicrymildewed [ghosts]
haunt the c.r.a.c.k.s in the w        do not
                           a        mistake
                           l        their voices
                           l        for
                           s

Wake-up callwhen you're drowning in an ocean of sad thoughts,
you don't trip out onto the beach:
sooner or later, the waves will sweep you off your feet
and you will be unprepared
when the waters close over your head.
instead, you take a deep breath
and say your prayers
and you dive in.
the quickest way to learn to swim
is to have no other choice.

Lucidall this time she's seemed so near
her angel face you hold so dear
she'll find you in that darkest time
her eyes will speak sans reason, rhyme
in time you will remember things
of birds and bones and broken wings
of deadly secrets, shattered dreams
things left unsaid and silent screams
with open heart and open mind
stand in the rain and you will find
that healing lies in these things true
and to remember changes you

MasqueradeI don't understand humans.
Through meticulous observation and careful analysis, I have become proficient in appropriate exhibition of and reaction to socially-accepted behavior, but that's exactly what it is: mimicry. It doesn't come naturally to me. Despite extensive synthesis of the information I have gleaned, my fabricated understanding still has some gaps.
That's why intimacy scares me: I find it incomprehensible. It doesn't follow the preexisting rules set by other social statutes. There doesn't seem to be a pattern of behavior at all upon which I can rely in order to anticipate the outcome of situations in which I may find myself. And if I don't understand something at least to some extent, I cannot present a convincing imitation, and that marks me as an outlier.
I'm tired of being an outlier. I want to be part of something I can't comprehend as a whole, something everyone else seems to understand instinctively.
I want to be <

BipolarYour gentle gaze like razor blades
Both cut me to the core
The shadows hide the lines you've crossed
Yet still I'm craving more
You're never who you seem to be
I don't know who you are
One moment you're the one I know
The next so very far
This dream in which we used to live
Uncertain now and bleak
Breathtaking as the cloudbreak is
Still havoc storms do wreak
My wild nightmare never ends
I cannot seem to wake
I'm desperate to find escape
Before I finally break
It's not you it's me I say
As hollow as it rings
No longer can I weather this
High time to test my wings
The words fall like an icy rain
Chilling, sharp, but true
Yet though I try to end it here
I'm still falling for you

Losing steamI am fifteen
but my body and
mutinous mind
are not mine.
I have scars on my arms
and memories of dark beauty--
bitter beads of blood
seeping shadows.
slide the knife
unzip my skin
and step outside--
who would I be
and how would I look?
perhaps I'm hollow?
what if--
underneath all this--
I'm not actually real?
maybe I was never here
just a dream
or was it a nightmare?
everybody wants me to
act my age
but I'm fifteen
so God only knows what that means.
not a child
not so innocent
not an adult
still too young.
I have to learn to talk to adults
and make phone calls to strangers
and manage my money
and drive a car.
I have to take care of the twins
teach them and protect them
and still be their friend.
I have to grow up soon
but i don't know if I'm ready...

Chainedi see it in your eyes i see the fading of the light
i see it in your stance i see you're giving up the fight
it's not the end so don't you dare consider giving in
keep your chin up let it show this time they will not win
they cannot keep you down can't see that you're too strong to bend
they say that you are breaking but i say that wounds will mend
love can heal a broken heart and faith can form a shield
against the sharp and cutting words of those who'd see you yield
for they are wrong and we are strong enough to find the light
don't fear the darkness closing in i'll see you through this night
don't be afraid to come to me if you need help to stand
proud and strong you'll prove them wrong i offer you my hand
i will be there for you always have been always will
though they may say that no one loves you i will stay with you until
the end of time please listen close you mean the world to me
i cannot stand to see you chained please let me set you free

NightmarePlot twist: you can't wake up.

ConstraintsSo much to say, so little--

Confessioni crave your touch.
[i still do, after all this time.]
i crave your fingers on my mouth,
your mouth whispering in my ear,
your ear pressed to my heart.
i crave the weight of you, reassuringly corporeal.
i drift away without you anchoring me.
you take my heart, when you leave,
and leave in its place an
unbearable lightness.

ControlControl is everything. Self-control, that is. Control how you act, what you say, what goes into your body, and maybe — just maybe — you'll be able to control you are. Power is addictive; my drug of choice, but it comes at a cost. You see, what you don't learn until it's too late? Sooner or later, the need for control — controls you.
Generally, I’m a good kid. I pay attention in school, earning the high grades that decorate my report cards. I may not be especially popular, but I certainly have friends. I usually do as I’m told, don’t flagrantly disobey rules, and I try hard to please people. I retrace my steps in my mind, searching for the slip — the fall — that landed me here, on this cool, clammy table, wearing not much more than a requisite thin gown.
A crisp knock on the heavy wooden door to the exam room startles me, bringing my attention back to my predicament at hand. After

Disengage[in some vague fashion]
she was aware of the i m p e n d i n g blow
but time seemed irrelevant [at the moment]:
struck by a strange--elegance?--
as his palm descended [with all the grace
of a tree felled by lightning];
the m.e.a.s.u.r.e.d, deliberate fall,
almost majestic in its resignation--
c u l m i n a t i n g with
a CRACK of thunder and
a bolt of pain.

In Piecesrum-lust lips make gentle friends,
words slurred in hands blurred,
burning in between the lines to find
some
drunken concoction of wilted laughs
and heavy sighs, scented sultry
with desperation.

you are that
rasping in my throat when my voice
deteriorates and I am left breathless
and hopeless and raw, my
muscles ache in memory of the
motions to forget-
we do not let go.

and cold beds call, stability,
metal frames and sunken heads –
rest now, rest with
a prayer on your lips you don't
care to share, a dream in
your mind you'll never get back;
rest and the earth will lend you peace
and

you will stop. the rivers will cle

Circular reasoningthis is not me.
this is not me
     so i am not here.
     i am not here
          so this isn't happening.
          this isn't happening
               so it can't be r e a l.

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More from ~violetense

thoughts of thornsyou were sent to me--
but as blessing, or lesson?
only time will tell.

Lesson learnedShe fell first, and scraped herself up on impact.
By the time you were ready to let to and trust that she would catch you,
she was no longer there.
She picked herself up, dusted herself off, and moved the fuck on,
because she's stronger than you.
And you were left holding the pieces when you hit the ground.

ElogioHas sangrado demasiados poemas de venas.

Por errorPudimos la fe en cielos falsos.

december 2010i am not hungry. i am not hungry.        no breakfast. no lunch. no snack. no dinner. zero zero zero
i am not hungry. i am not hungry.        food is bad. i don't need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't
i am not hungry. i am not hungry.        need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't
i am not hungry. i am not hungry.        need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't
i am not hungry. i am not hungry.        need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't need to eat. i don't.
i am not hungry. i am not hungry. must not eat. will not eat. cannot eat. do not eat.
resolution for today: i will not eat.

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Submitted: May 8, 2012
Submitted with: Sta.sh Writer

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Invocation

by ~violetense, May 8, 2012, 6:00:42 PM
Literature / Poetry / General Poetry / Free Verse

_{Speak through me, Muse, and sing me the tale
Of that girl unskilled in the ways of the world--
The intrepid wanderer,
Seeking truth for years on end,
Oblivious to the dynamics around her
As others talk with their eyes and dance with their words.

Many the nights she's lain awake,
Living the hurts of her friends, powerless to help.
Trying to save the world
When she can't even save herself.

She wrote dark storms of words
And ascertained the deceptive nature of journals.
She lied to others and she lied to herself.
She learned that sharp words leave scars,
Struggling each day to open her eyes
And walk toward the light;

Yet despite her best intentions, sometimes she strayed:
But hands were there to guide her back to the path,
And hearts were there to share her pain.
Growing and changing and coming to see
That she didn't have to understand humanity to be human--
She doesn't have to earn love to be loved,
And angels can hide in the oddest of places.

Of these trials and tribulations, Muse, tell us in our time:
Give her song wings once more.}

Invocationby ~violetense

Literature / Poetry / General Poetry / Free Verse

My English assignment was to compose an original poem modeled after the Invocation in Book One of The Odyssey. For those unfamiliar with the text, translation of the passage follows:

Sing to me of the man, Muse, the man of twists and turns
Driven time and again off course, once he had plundered
The hallowed heights of Troy.
Many cities of men he saw and learned their minds,
Many pains he suffered, heartsick on the open sea,
Fighting to save his life and bring his comrades home.
But he could not save them from disaster, hard as he strove--
The recklessness of their own ways destroyed them all,
The blind fools, they devoured the cattle of the Sun
And the Sungod wiped from sight the day of their return.
Launch out on his story, Muse, daughter of Zeus,
Start from where you will--sing for our time, too.

Translation by Robert Fagles: [link]

Accompanying illustration found here: [link]

Please do not use without my permission.
Comments are welcome and greatly appreciated. Any feedback is great to hear. What can I do better?

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